Growing Miracles: Nervous habits

Nervous habits such as biting nails, twisting hair, tugging ears, and grinding teeth can be signs of stress. Adjusting to new routines, fear of disapproval, moving, or making new friends can all cause stress in children.

Responding calmly and positively to children's nervous habits will help them overcome and eventually stop them. Children punished for their habits can end up feeling more stress and a greater need for comfort, making their nervous habits worse.

As your child learns to cope with stress or learns other ways to comfort themselves, their nervous habit may just disappear.

To help your child you can:

• Increase the time you spend with your child and focus on positive attention.
• Make as little fuss as possible while still listening carefully and respectfully to what your child tells you about his fears.
• Try to find and reduce the stresses in your child's life that may be causing the habit.
• Ensure your child is getting enough sleep and healthy food.
• Offer a replacement such as a worry stone, doll, lucky charm they can rub, or elastic they can stretch. Favourite and familiar objects, such as blankets, stuffed toys or pictures can help your child feel more comfortable.
• Find some quiet time to spend alone (for example, on a walk or just before bed) to talk about your child's day and how he is feeling. Let your child know most people find it hard to make changes. Be a child's "scrapbook of memories" of times when they were successful with other changes or stresses.
• Help your child come up with his own ideas for dealing with his stresses and fears.

If your child's nervous habits are becoming compulsive or interfering with his daily life, talk to your doctor.