April 16, 2025
Ann and Neil Parry (shown) get a lesson in Advance Care Planning from their daughter, Kathleen, at a Green Sleeve Party in their Devon-area home. Photo by Evan Isbister.
Story by Kim Bradley | Photo by Evan Isbister
Talking about your end-of-life wishes need not be morbid or sad. If you view it as a positive step towards looking after you and your loved ones — you can even turn it into a party!
That’s exactly what Ann and Neil Parry did. They invited their friends over to their Green Sleeve Party to mark National Advance Care Planning day to learn more about how to write personal directives.
“It wasn’t upsetting,” says Ann. “It was a positive thing.
“I was reluctant to think about it, but it’s much more accessible, and easier to talk about than I feared,” adds the 64-year-old. “The reality is that, sooner or later, there’s a possibility that you may become ill. This feels like a safety net for me now, rather than a barrier.”
Parry’s daughter Kathleen, a Senior Practice Consultant for Advance Care Planning with Alberta Health Services (AHS), has been urging her parents to do a personal directive for years, not because they’re getting older or facing illness, but because everyone should have one, just in case.
To make it fun, they gathered friends and shared snacks in their home in Stony Plain, while Kathleen showed them how simple it is to document their wishes.
Ann says she was surprised to learn that even if she documents her wishes now, she still has the ability to change her mind in a real scenario. Having a Green Sleeve also protects family members so they don’t have to guess in a difficult, emotional moment what she or Neil may have wanted.
“It lifts that burden from your family. They don’t have to bear the guilt in thinking that they should have done this or that,” she says. “How are they going to know if I haven’t left instructions?”
A Green Sleeve is a package of information everyone can complete to ensure their healthcare providers know their treatment wishes in the event they become too ill or injured to speak for themselves.
“We’re young and healthy,” says Ann, “and the possibility of being incapacitated doesn’t even cross our minds. It’s a hard thing to think about when you’re healthy and active. It’s hard to imagine a moment when we may not be.”
Now, with their wishes written down and shared with friends and family, the Parrys feel a sense of freedom, one they weren’t even aware they needed.
“I found that really reassuring.”
April 16 is National Advance Care Planning Day. To host your own Green Sleeve Party, or to get step-by-step instructions on documenting your own wishes, visit our website.
